Uninspired is an understatement. I've lived on writer's block for so long they've started sending my mail there.
Oh well, sometimes a turd is just a turd. Lately the mashed potatoes don't mean anything.
The zyban isn't kicking in and all the bills are paid. Thirteen hour nights at work seem to pass like anvils through the anus. I have a lover who is as comfortable as heaven .
The fridge is full and the heat is on.
The window open and the breeze just right. A full pack of cigarettes and a cold diet soda.
But my head is a dull buzz. Lately I've been anti-art film. I've caught myself leaving the dial on pop radio stations. I've actually desired a shopping spree at wal-mart.
And let's not even begin to discuss a steadily growing addiction to cable.
But, before I suck on a shotgun, before I unfold a flag of white surrender, before I shackle my ankles with the American Dream...
I shall dig deep inside and try to find something- some self-redeeming seed of cool, the tiniest flame of bizarre, the slightist creative heartbeat.
But fuck it, I think oprah's on....

It's easy to be racist when it's nearly 2:30 in the morning and you're stuck on the last bus home and it's filled to the brim with multi-colored faces. It's easy to claim pure-blood nationalism when you go to the grocery store (with is pure hell in itself) and all you hear is the constant unfamiliar chatter of foreign languages about you. It's easy to get upset when you hear the statistics on the amount of illegal drugs being smuggled into this country with the single purpose to addict our children on a daily basis.

It's also easy to get upset when you hear the stories of officials prying open abandoned boxcars revealing their rotten human cargo inside. It's easy to fight when you look into the downright shitjobs immigrants are taking because 'no one else will'. It's easy to raise an eyebrow when you think 'well, when you get right down to it we're ALL IMMIGRANTS in some way or another'.
Before we start building midevil concrete barriers and rallying in the street we need to take a step back and we need to take RESPONSIBILITY. When you get right down to it that was the core fundamental our founding fathers(and mothers) based our radical new government on-RESPONSIBILITY.
They key word in ths whole debate that I have an issue with is ILLEGAL. Illegal (as far as I've always been taught implies that a law is being broken. And laws are set to maintain equilibrium and provide a working system and blah blah blah amen. It makes pure sense here that if a law is being broken then why are we allowing it to continue..why are we condoning it. I remember a handful of years ago when a little Cuban boy found floating in a raft with his dead family on board was sent packing back to his little island of communistic horrors. Meanwhile hordes of illegal immigrants are charging (and I do mean charging) across our borders daily. A crime is a crime-that bitch justice tips her scales for no one (Yeah, right).
If you want the freedoms that this nation supposedly provides then you must EARN them. Even those of us who were born into this mess need to get to it and do something. If you want your citizenship come on in , fill out the dotted lines, bust your balls, go through the motions like the rest of us. Pay your taxes (like we all do-right?), follow the rules, and take on that RESPONSIBILITY.
But, I'd be living insome sort of fantasy world if I thought that America's gargantuan industries did not benefit nor exploit the work of illegal immigrants. I'd start bitching if the price of my LARRY THE CABLE GUY boxer shorts and STAR WARS Pez dispensers skyrocketed because of an increase in legal wages. But let's not forget that there are a lot of legal citizens that would love to have some of those 'less than white' jobs you hear about so much in this debate.
And if you love this country so much to risk your precious life running across the desert and facing the fact of failure just to get into it then -STAY IN IT! Because money made here and sent somewhere else is a slap in the face. Don't bite the hand that feeds you. One of my best friends in High School came from a mexican family and everyone straight down to his older brothers worked the fields to earn a living. They became citizens , not by hopping a fence and milking the system, but by hard work and a desire to be a part of it. The family maintained their heritage and his mother was a very vocal member of the growing Mexican community in our developing town. Their past had not been dilluted along the way-better yet, it had been brought with them to the table.
And I can't help but think that there's a kind of polar mirror effect going on here. That just maybe the thing that makes us born-n-bred citizens feel so 'uncomfortable' with the growing number of immigrants is that unbridled desire to work these people have when they've got so much to lose. Are we maybe just a wee bit afraid of being shown up?
Here are just some ideas to help both sides out.
CITIZENS: learn some spanish, go out and get those jobs neccessary to make this country work, vote, try to understand others
IMMIGRANTS: learn some english, take the legal steps to citizenship, try to understand others
And if Mexico or whatever country you come from is so bad then why don't you put the effort into trying to fix it instead of fleeing it.

NEXT POST: Something borrowed, something broken, something used, something leftist.

Another day in the IDIOT KINGDOM. Crown me king of it all. My apartment has become a prison. My throne-a folding chair. My psycho obsessive neighbor continues with his non-stop harassment. He's got my keys now. I accidentally left them in my door the other night, now they are in his possession. One night I'm sure I'll come home and see him sitting in MY chair and smoking the half-smoked cigarettes out of MY ashtray. I'm being stalked by a real-life Al Bundy. He remains unemployed ,this gives him more time to think and come up with new ways to annoy me. Chances are he has my personal information and has stolen my identity. So if you come across any wrongdoings or just plain evil things attributed to yours truly over the past two years or so -IT WASN'T ME.
I give up.
And oh yeah, I caught the Larry the Cable Guy Movie. I say this lightly because,to be honest, I already forgot that I saw it. Why Larry the Cable Guy felt he needed to make a movie, well all I can mutter is the name Ernest. Both Dan Whitney (Larry) and Jim Varney (Ernest) are and were talents on their own. The poor bastards just got stuck in a marketable character. Now I will admit I am a fan of Larry and have caught myself sputtering out some of his 'redneck' humour after a six pack or two. (As I write this I adjust myself in my GIT-R-DONE boxers.)
What Dan has done is taken an american icon and ran with it. When it comes to social commentary what is more effective- the ass blowing simple redneck of Larry the Cable Guy( especially his jabs at our treatment of the handicap and immigrants) or the biting wit of David Chappelle ( whom I am also a big fan of)? If you can separate your self in such an observational matter then you won't be embarrased to go see this flick.
Job hunting, the new episodes of Dr. Who, declaring holy war on my kitchen-these are things that occupy my time. The Chest X-ray came back clear so I've been given a second chance at this whole life thing. Starting over somewhat. But it's kind of like a loaded prayer- a real car salesman contract.
"Okay God, if you make it so mom and dad won't find my pot stash I'll start going to church on sundays"
"Okay, Lord, if the test comes back negative I'll change, no really this time I meant it"

"If you pull the chain on a toilet you can't blame it for flushing can you?"
-Charles Starkweather


On January 21, 1958 it all started. Starkweather(19), accompanied by his girlfriend Caril Fugate(14),murdered ten people in eight days. The first three were members of Fugate's family. This probably made them the most famous lovebirds to come out of my home state of Nebraska.

Fastforward it all, oh say, about fifty years or so. Just turn on the television. I do, sometimes, I'll admit it. Being a blessed victim of insomnia I'll usually put on the devil box while I'm scratching away these words. Just a few days ago some 28 year old opens fire at an after-rave party in the northwest. One of the victims(a 14 year old girl) was staying out past her 3 a.m. curfew. In the south a preacher's wife does him in with a shotgun blast to the back. A blonde preppy is still missing in mystery of Aruba. Pedophile monsters are strolling the dark playgrounds of America. A gazillion people a day are hopping our borders and milking our system and the gates of armageddon are opening somewhere over the sands of Iran. Do you want a front row seat?
And that's only in the first half-hour.

I'd like to call it TERRORISM FROM THE TUBE.

Just the past few days my lady and I took a quick getaway down to Colorado Springs. (Stay with me this is going somewhere). I stepped foot in a place where time stretched on forever and I was a mere speck along the road-The Garden of the Gods. Passing through its dizzying red gates I was looking at a much different scope of the world. Millions of years surrounded me , structures carved by time itself. Layer upon layer of permanent history.
And,perhaps just for the several hours I scuttled about inside, there was no border conflict. There were no missing kids in Milwaukee. No Good American boys died in the desert. And just maybe there were no fingers being pointed at anyone anywere.
Point? In the millions of years it will take to turn the mountains to bone will it really matter? Your life is your eyes and your soul. Your experiences and your loves. Husbands and wives will continue to kill each other. Our world leaders will always be
jackoffs. It can really get to you, this world around you, but you can't let it.
Don't let it win-ever.